I’m rather a solitary, independent person, and not often lonely. My living situation puts me in close proximity with my son and his girlfriend by necessity. While I love being able to talk to him as much I do, I prefer my own space and am working to get back to that. Yet, I desire to belong to a community of people who have had similar experiences or who have the same problems to deal with.

Some of my favorite Youtubers include a lady who is a mom, blogger, and recovering addict who’s been clean for five years; a hilarious comedian with a stutter and a sweet dog; a fashionable and savvy blind girl; and several athletes who have worked really hard to get fit so they could compete in American Ninja Warrior competitions.

Years ago, I was in regular contact with a couple groups for ex-JWs, but I’ve moved beyond the need for that. I also led a crochet and knitting group for a couple years. I think some of them still meet up, but I don’t know where and I haven’t had much time for yarn work lately. I’m an editor and a writer and book lover so naturally, I’m in a couple writing groups on Facebook. While I was traveling with an ex-partner around the country, I felt some comradery with other trucker-wives. More recently, I’ve felt drawn to Christians who understand the Bible’s true message, and Jesus’s free gift of grace.

There are so many people I admire and others who just make me laugh. I can usually relate to some of their challenges or triumphs, but I don’t feel like I’m really a solid member of any particular group per se, or that anyone considers me one of their ‘people’. Why do I feel the desire to? That’s the hundred-bitcoin question.

I think I would like to identify and connect with a circle of friends occasionally, then retreat to solitude. Maybe a travel group, or community of small business owners.

Do any of you feel the same way? Why do you think people develop this need to belong?

I think some of the motivations are fairly clear: friendship, validation of certain ideas or beliefs, exchange of experiences and ideas.

Other less obvious motivations may include: boredom, loneliness, a need for direction, acceptance, reputation or status.

Comment below with your thoughts!